Wannabe Cowgirl

It is here. Darn it for coming out the day before NaNoWriMo 2006 starts. This will probably seriously impede my novelizations. Ah but Final Fantasy is worth it...

That's right -- it's not even November and there's already snow on the ground! This morning I walked out my front door to see a pretty decent dusting of snow on the ground. Cody and I visited the Bark Park, where he had a fabulous time playing in the snow for the first time in quite a while. He tore around the place like a madman -- or, maddog, I suppose -- and even went so far as to jump in the river. Brrr! He soon had frost covering his fur.

It's a little scary that it's so cold this early on in the year, but I'm excited. I love snow, and I can't wait to go sledding and ice skating. And even, perhaps, a little snow folfing...

It's hard to believe where a year can take you, how much can change and fade and grow in 365 days. While it's passing, a year seems like such a long stretch of time, but looking back it's strange how it seems to have gone so quickly. Today was a big day of reflection on the past year of my own life. A year ago today, I found my nervous way to CLC for the first time, where I met some of the most wonderful people who would eventually become much loved friends. I also attended the kick-off meeting for National Novel Writing Month 2005, meeting a small but awesome bunch of similarly neurotic writers.

So what has changed since that day I thought I would be late to the new church because of my non-knowledge of daylight savings in Montana? A bunch of big stuff, of course, is different. New home, new job. No longer can I step just outside my front door and hear nothing but a vast silence marked by the occasional coyote howl, or look up at night and see a terrifying eternity of stars and space. Some of those new people I met one year ago today have become better friends than I could have hoped for, who have opened their doors and hearts to me so often and so generously that I could never experess my thanks with all the poetry ever spoken.

I wrote a novel. I spent the next year worrying about said novel and if I could ever write again, and now I'm at the same threshold. This time I have a small army of fellow writers at my side and I can't wait to know them better, to hear their inevitable whining (although probably not as much as they will hear my own sad whimpers) and maybe even read their stories. I have a dog. A wonderful, white, galumphing love of a dog. I'm at another new church, and in two groups where, although I'm quite new, I already feel at home. I am the lone female at my new job, a situation that is new and strange and surprisingly wonderful.


I've made a baby step or two into knowing God's purpose for earth, for us, for life a little better -- loving people. I got baptized. I fell for a guy for the first time, and am in the process of getting up, dusting off my scrapes, and moving on. I began to embrace my femininity. I learned that love isn't fluffy and cute and pink, and that marriage isn't all about donning an apron and making like Martha Stewart, and that I want both love and marriage. I reached my mid-twenties, and felt older in a new way. I climbed mountains. I swam in blue waters. I ate cake and laughed and tried to love. I suppose that's not so bad for a year?

So. I'm a big nerd. But a super Buffy-nated nerd.

You Are Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"We saved the world. I say we have to party."

The inspiration forms
in His heart
like a dawning
sun, smallest ember of light
sparking into gold. He
feels it pouring
through Himself, limitless
in possibility. He rocks
it close, fragile
soul, before breathing
it into being.

(Ecclesiastes 12:7)